So you’re going to an open mic. Maybe to perform, maybe just to watch. You are a brave soul.
Open mics are the petri dishes of stand-up. Most of it is bacteria, but sometimes you find penicillin. Here are the 4 types of comedy acts you are guaranteed to see.
1. The “Reader”
This person is reading off their phone. They have zero eye contact. They are muttering.
- Verdict: Painful. But we all started there.
2. The “Edgelord”
They think offensive = funny. They scream about politics or shock value topics but have no punchlines.
- Verdict: The silence in the room will be deafening.
3. The “Storyteller”
They don’t have jokes. They have a 7-minute story about their cat that ends with… nothing.
- Verdict: Needs an editor.
4. The “Killer”
Then, suddenly, someone walks up. They move the mic stand. They look at the crowd. And they crush.
- Verdict: This is why you go. To find the diamond in the rough.
Open mics are raw. They are awkward. But they are necessary. If you want the filtered version, watch Netflix. If you want the reality, go to a mic (or just watch Mint, where we filter the bad ones out for you).
